Scott Benson: All right, so I this is one thing I will I will promise you by the end of this call there will be two nuggets minimum that you will take out of it. I've actually been preparing for this call for a couple of days and and I've been going through a lot of different um topics that I wanted to touch on and then specific analogies that I want to come up with and um I think I've landed on some really good stuff.
Scott Benson: So I hope you guys agree. Uh these calls are meant to be a smaller group as always and um we do want your feedback. We do want to go through specific scenarios afterwards if you have anything you want to touch on, but it's a 15minute high impact very tactical uh sort of coaching topic and then we kind of break and if there's nothing else, we let you get on with your day. So having said that, I'm going to jump right in here. And today, somebody remind me because I'm I'm going to break through uh this this presentation at at one point and I want to bring out and break out bring up and break out the topic of the analogy of being a bodyguard. A bodyguard. Okay? And we're going to actually talk about uh the realtor and and its similarity to a bodyguard. Um Okay. So, now that I've told you that, just remind me about that. Okay. Let's break this out. So the today's topic is called the currency of liab of liability.
Scott Benson: The currency of likability. Ryan, are you on the call?
Ryan Campbell: I'm here.
Scott Benson: Okay.
Ryan Campbell: I'm here.
Scott Benson: This is you just so you know. So So your current No, no. I'm being serious. I'm being
Ryan Campbell: Scott loves to talk about how I'm likable,
Scott Benson: serious.
Ryan Campbell: but I feel like an a****** most of the time, so I'm happy to take it
Scott Benson: Trust Trust me on this. You have the currency of likability. So, I thought about you a lot when I was preparing.
Ryan Campbell: in.
Scott Benson: Okay. So, let me start with something simple but powerful. People do not do business with the smartest person in the room. They do business with the person they like and trust the most. Competency gets you in the door. Likability closes the deal and keeps it coming back. Today,
Ryan Campbell: Did Scott just call me dumb?
Scott Benson: we're going to break No, not at all. No,
Ryan Campbell: I'm
Chris Chopite: That's exactly what he was trying to say,
Scott Benson: not at all.
Chris Chopite: Ryan. That's what it
Ryan Campbell: kidding.
Scott Benson: So, no,
Chris Chopite: was.
Scott Benson: not at all, bud. So today we're going to break down exactly how to become that person. The one that people want to work with, refer and trust with their money, time, and decisions. Likability is not a personality trait. So as much as you all think that like, oh, you know, I was just born this way or, you know, I'm this way because of my environment or whatever the case is, there are still choices that we get to make. And so like I say, likability is not a personality trait. A lot of people think likability is something you're born with. It is not. Likability is built on a few repeatable behaviors. Okay, write these down or jot these down in your mental notes. These are the behaviors. Making pe people feel understood. Making people feel respected. Making people feel good about themselves.
Scott Benson: One thing you'll notice about all three of those statements is they have nothing to do with you or me. They have everything to do with being others centered. So you're not trying to be something yourself. You're actually trying to make the other person feel a certain way. So those three things again, we're making people feel understood, making people feel respected, and making people feel good about themselves. That is it. That is what likability is. Okay. I'm going to tell you why I love real estate. And I I truly love real estate. I think all the time like you do about all the different things that you can do in the world and vocations and what you could do for you know side hustle here or anything. I always come back to real estate because I truly love the fact that to be better in real estate you have to become a better human being because you are the product. I am the product. I'm not selling a chocolate bar on the shelf.
Scott Benson: I'm not, you know, selling some um abstract third-party uh service. I'm selling my own services. I'm selling me. I am the product. And so if you want to become better in the industry, you have to be a better version of yourself. Which is why I love this because it's a lifelong business of basically trying to become a better version of yourself, which your spouse and your kids and your brother and your parents and all people want to see uh you do well in this um in this scope. Okay. So if someone walks away from you thinking that person gets me or that felt good, you have already won. Think about the I've said this before. I'm going to say it again. Think about the person that you really really like. So everybody has somebody in their mind right now where you're like that person comes to mind when when you say think of someone you really really like. I really really like that person. Okay, everybody got that person in their mind?
Scott Benson: Okay, now think about this. Do they really like you? I am almost gonna guarantee that a 100% of the time it's going to be someone that really likes you because they made you feel understood. They made you feel respected. They made you feel good about yourself. So that's the the the thing that we're striving towards in sales. Okay. So let's actually break out how to actually get better at this. Okay. So again, the goal is to have that person think, "This realtor gets me. This realtor made me feel good." If if if that is happening, you have already won. Okay, so here's the five pillars. Five pillars of being someone who people want to do business with. Number one, genuine interest, not fake charm. So we all know that people can smell fake from a mile away. So instead of trying to impress them, shift your mindset to I'm here to understand. We want to make practical moves. Ask thoughtful questions.
Scott Benson: Listening without interrupting. Repeat back what they said. So here's an example of that. So just so I understand, you're looking for stability more than high risk. Right? That one sentence will build more trust than any 10-minute pitch. Okay. Number two, we're going to give five pillars on how to actually break this out. Number two, clarity over complexity. People don't like feeling confused. So if you make things complicated, they associate you with confusion. Who knows what Sam McDaddy's big tagline on all of his marketing was? I don't know if it is currently, but certainly over the last 10 years, he used it repeatedly, over and over and over again. Do you remember what it was?
Steve Zahnd: Was there like something like there's
Ryan Campbell: My eyebrows are better than yours.
Scott Benson: His eyebrows are pretty good.
Steve Zahnd: 100 things to do?
Scott Benson: His eyebrows are pretty good.
Steve Zahnd: 100 things to do, but I'll do I just call me and that's the only thing you need.
Steve Zahnd: Something like that.
Scott Benson: Exactly. Exactly. So So Steve's got it. So he took all the complications and basically was saying like here's the there's there's 15 things that need to get done or you can just call me and give me the keys and I'll take care of them all. And so essentially what he was doing is he's taking a very complex complicated process and he's just like do you want to just hand me the keys and get out of the way? you say that in a polite and friendly way, you are going to win over and over and over again. Okay? You want to avoid jargon. You want to use analogies. So, think of as many good analogies as you can. And I'm going to give you my favorite one that I've ever heard. I learned it while preparing for this call. A realtor, I want you to think of me, Mr. Seller, Mrs. Seller. I want you to think of me like a bodyguard. I will fight for you, but I will not fight with you.
Scott Benson: Like, I will protect you from everything that you need protection from, but I'm always always on your side. Especially in this market, I think a lot of realtors get in conflict or in arguments or on opposite sides of as their client and they constantly need to be reminded like just remember I'm the bodyguard here. So, like I'm the realtor bodyguard. I am going to protect you from everything. uh I'm going to secure the highest and best sale for you, but I also need you to, you know, follow some guidance, etc. Okay, I love that analogy. All right, reli this is the third breakout. Reliability is magnetic. Likability isn't just personality, it's consistency. So, do what you say you're going to do every time. Because here's the truth. People don't refer nice people. I know a lot of nice people. I don't refer those people to my friends and family. I refer people who follow up when they say they will, when they're on time, when they underpromise and overd deliver.
Scott Benson: Those are the people that I refer and I'm often not referring the smartest people that I know. So, it's like this isn't the the smartest um contractor that I know or this isn't the smartest business person that I know, but every time I've needed them, they were there. They were on time. They were punctual. They did what they said they were going to do. They came in on budget, etc., etc. Okay. Number four, emotional control. Nobody wants to do business with somebody who is unpredictable. And I'm just going to tell you this, for me, this is the area that I'm working on the most. I want to work on being the same person consistently day in day out. And I don't want that person to be a jerk. I want that person to be, you know, competent, kind, uh, compassionate, but I also want that person to be a doer. I want that person to be effective, efficient, a go-getter, etc. I don't want to have highs and lows.
Scott Benson: I want to be a consistent person and so I'm really working on self-control.
Chris Chopite: Oh my
Scott Benson: Emotional control is also considered self-control. Sorry,
Chris Chopite: gosh.
Scott Benson: someone jump in there with a question. No. All right. So, emotional control probably the the the main point about emotional control is you you're not getting defensive. You're not reacting emotionally to objectives. You're staying calm under pressure. And when people feel your stability, they relax. Think about the person that you feel the most relaxed around. They are a very consistent person. You're not worried about them flying off the handle or coming out of left field or dunking on top of you. Things that I'm guilty of, by the way. So, that is a person that has significant emotional control, self-control. Number five is confidence without arrogance. Confidence attracts. Arrogance repels. So, what is the difference? Confidence says, "I know what I'm doing. I'm here to help you." Arrogance says, "I know more than you." Okay?
Scott Benson: The one builds trust, the others build the other builds resistance. So, here's the practical breakout of that. Speak clearly and directly, but don't feel the need to oversell. Be okay, I don't know, but I will find out. And obviously, find out. The last one builds massive credibility. Okay, so here's the multi here's the hidden multiplier and I would say that this is for me the most impactful of the presentation. This is the part most people ignore. Your energy walks into the room before you do. So, so ask yourself I'm actually going to ask you this question before I ask you to ask yourself it. When you walk into when you leave the gym, do you feel better for having gone or worse than having having went? Most people would say I feel better. You might feel terrible walking in, but walking out when the work when the workout is done, do you feel better? Okay. Same thing if you're a person who goes to a place of worship.
Scott Benson: When you walk into that place of worship, by the time you walk out, do you feel better for having gone? Well, the same thing is true when you walk into their house, do they feel better after you were there or do they feel worse? That's the simple way of breaking down this hidden multiplier. Everywhere you go, you want to be the person that they felt better for having been in your presence. So, every time you're around, it's like, "Wow, I love that Chris came over today, or that felt really good, or it was great to see Ryan, or wow, I feel really good after talking to Steve." If you're consistently that person, it doesn't matter if you're selling rocket chips or real estate or frisbes, you are going to be very, very successful. So this is the part where you're going to ask yourself, do people feel better after talking to me? Like answer that internally right now. I would say for me it would be like a 50/50. 50 50% of the time maybe people feel better after talking to me.
Scott Benson: And I want to get that up to like 100% 90%. I want people to always feel better after talking to me. Here's the second question. Do I bring calm or pressure? Third question for you. Do I create ease or tension? People associate your energy with your brand? Because what you're bringing to the table, what you're bringing to the conversation, what you're bringing into that room is you. You're actually bringing your personality in there. And so, do they feel rushed? Do they feel desperate like they need to pull back? Do they feel grounded? Do they feel like they can lean in? Your presence is a silent pitch. So that's the goal on what we're working on. And again, this all groups under likability. If you achieve any of these to a better degree, your likability is going up. All right. So, what actually makes people say yes is at the end of the day, that is ultimately what we're looking for is more people say yes.
Scott Benson: They trust you. They feel understood. They feel safe. Not pressured, not overwhelmed, not sold, but safe. How do we achieve that? I'll post these notes or Georgia. I'll send it to Georgia because I don't know how to post these notes, but she'll post these notes after. You can read up and and and go exactly down the list of the things that you can do. But I would say if you master creating that feeling of making people feel safe, your close rate will naturally go up without pushing. So if you remember nothing else, remember this. People won't always remember what you said, but they will always remember how you made them feel. I'm gonna say that one more time. They won't always remember what you said, but they will remember how you made them feel. So, be the person who listens better than anyone else, who explains things clearly, who shows up consistently, who stays who stays calm under pressure, and who carries quiet confidence. Because if you do that, if we work on that together, you will effectively become a better closer.
Scott Benson: All right, I'm going to pause there. It's exactly 15 minutes feedback, questions. How are we going to integrate this into our actual daily walk?
Mark Palmer: What was the one before uh clarity and confusion? What was the first the
Scott Benson: Uh, let me pull it up.
Mark Palmer: one?
Andrew Courson: Genuine interest.
Scott Benson: The first of the five first of the five pillars.
Mark Palmer: Yes, please.
Scott Benson: Yeah. Genuine interest, not fake charm. So basically what you're saying is is like people can smell fake from a mile away. So instead of trying to impress them, shift your mindset to I'm here to understand. And what I would say it another way, instead of like boasting all about yourself, dig into more about them. Because remember, when people feel like they want to when they feel like they like you, it's it's generally because you're interested in them. If they feel like you're arrogant, it's generally because you're interested in yourself. And I'm not saying that you can't boast accolades and you can't show a listing presentation that says we're the top team at this and that and you have all these listings.
Scott Benson: But what I'm saying is is that if you meet any, this is not just a listing appointment or a buyer appointment. This is just everyday conversations that you're having. If they leave that conversation thinking, "This person just talked about themselves. They weren't interested in me. They weren't interested in my plan." You're probably going to be on the losing end of uh a lot of opportunities. I would say
Georgia Huntley: If there's anything that comes to mind that you want um us to talk on, I just launched a poll and select a topic so Scott has um specific feedback to work off in the future.
Scott Benson: Yeah. Yeah. And I would say like for me my my my goal is even if we just grab one or two people to like how are we going to break this out this week. Um I'll just give you a real life example and this is me being very raw potentially vulnerable. So 10 minutes before this call and this is what always happens to me. I didn't realize that there was somebody else in my house.
Scott Benson: So I was talking to my wife and my children like I was the only person in the house. And I was very direct. I would say that's even kind. I was probably slightly offside. So, this is what actually happened. My wife's I'm like, "Look, I have to jump on a call. I've got five minutes to eat." And and basically what I was saying is is like, "Where where is lunch? Like, what's going on here?" Like, "Why isn't lunch ready?" Like, we have a we have our rolls and I do this and you do that and you generally have lunch. And anyways, she wanted to smack me and probably deserve to. So, she puts a hard-boiled egg in the microwave, which I'm Who eats a hard-boiled egg warmed up? I don't know. But anyways, I'm I'm letting that go. It ex My little six-year-old daughter takes it out of the microwave. It explodes in her face. This is just happened, by the way.
Scott Benson: We're talking like 25 minutes ago, and my six-year-old daughter's crying. And the words that I said, I'm not going to repeat, but I didn't swear. And I wasn't like totally aggressive, but I was definitely not kind and loving. I was not likable. Well, then we have this tutor that's tutoring my kids, and she's my age, 45 year old woman. I didn't realize she was in the house, and she comes like tiptoeing down the stairs right after I basically said what I what I said. And I'm like, "Oh boy, here we go. Here's my point. We are not going to do this perfectly, but what we do when things don't go right, like how we correct, how we're willing to move forward after that. So, this is this was told to me by a great uh teacher one time and he said to me, "This has gotten me so far in life. Um, I'm sorry that was my fault. I don't want to be that person. May I have your forgiveness?" Or something to that effect.
Scott Benson: I'm sorry. That was my fault. I don't want to be that person. May I have your forgiveness? And I literally went in. So, you guys saw me on uh no uh video there for the first two minutes. I literally put I'm like, I have to do this right now. I put it on pause. I went walked in. I said to my wife, I'm sorry that was my fault. I don't want to be that person. May I have your forgiveness? And I'll tell you what, like, do you think my day is going to go as well as it would have if I didn't like explode like the boiled egg? It's going to go better. Like, do you guys get that? Do Let me leave you with this analogy. Anybody know what happens to a broken bone after it heals? Tell me if you know. Go ahead, Ry.
Ryan Campbell: It's uh stronger.
Scott Benson: Yeah. This is like a phenomenon of the human body,
Ryan Campbell: I have a really strong finger here.
Scott Benson: but I think it's an inc.
Ryan Campbell: This is a super finger.
Scott Benson: You guys can look this up after this call, but when a broken bone heals, it becomes strong. You break your leg, it heals. It's stronger than your leg that never broke. So, same thing in relationships. Same thing in in our marriages, with our kids, with our friends, with our colleagues, with our our co-workers, like everything can be remedied if we have humility to go about it. So, this is not much like a how to gain the next lead or how to market better. This is just a a teaching on like let's be better versions of ourselves because get this is this is the irony. We make more money when we're better versions of ourselves. We agree, right? Like my marriage is stronger. My day is going to go better today because I exploded over a hard-boiled egg, but I had the humility to make it right.
Ryan Campbell: Can I ask a question,
Scott Benson: anyways. Yeah.
Ryan Campbell: Scott?
Scott Benson: Yes, sir.
Ryan Campbell: Okay, so you have been married for a while now. Uh, you had that script pretty uh dialed in. Do you say the same thing every time? And then does she call you out and say, "That's the script that you've uh you read to me a hundred
Scott Benson: Yeah. So, fair answer. So, fair question and I'll give you a real answer.
Ryan Campbell: times.
Scott Benson: So, yes, I say generally the same thing every time, but it's it's how you say it. So, I'll give you another little tidbit. Just these are my tidbits as a as a father. Whenever my kids are bickering, I've taught them to say, "Okay, no problem. Okay, no problem." But I've taught them to say it like that. You could also say, "Okay, no problem. Okay, no problem." Like they could say it that way when they're bickering or they could say, "Okay, no problem. Okay,
Scott Benson: no problem." Like it's a diffusing way of saying it. So my point in saying that is to say this. I say the same thing over, but I say it in humility. So I literally say, "Look, either I'm sorry that was my fault. I don't want to be that person. Can I have your forgiveness?" If it's said that way or if it's just said like a routine thing, then she catches how I say it. And so that that's why I think that the words we say matter, but also the way we say it matters. And I'm constantly learning. Like today was the biggest like whoa, I love this bodyguard analogy. I've never used it in real estate, but I'm going to start using it now, right? Like I immediately think of the movie the bodyguard like the uh Kevin Cosner, wasn't it? And it's like he's there to protect. He's there to guide. He's not there to fight against Whitney Houston. He is literally there to protect and guide.
Scott Benson: What a great imagery for a realtor. Like, I'm not here to fight you. I want to be your bodyguard. What if we said that on the next price correction? Like, look, I don't I don't want to be against you in any way. I just want to be your bodyguard. Like, I we're on the same team. I want the best for you. Our outcomes are are are equally important in terms of what we're trying to achieve. And I want you to see me as your bodyguard. And if any point you don't, I want you to tell me how I can make that better because that's who I want to be for you. And when we say these things and when we also hang out with people that want to strive to be better versions of ourselves, like life is is more enjoyable and the day the day goes by better and we learn from one another. So anyways, I hope that you guys get little nuggets that you can take and use and and and put in place.
Scott Benson: And if there's anything else that you guys have to add, let let's talk about it now. So I'm going to challenge you then. I'm going to challenge you on this. always good because this is a real estate uh coaching call to use this in your business, but use something that you heard today in life today. Like literally make an action step where you're going to be like, "Okay, you know what? I probably owe an apology here, but I just known this person for so long that I just kind of let it roll and I I didn't address it." But I'm going to actually call them after this and I'm going to be like, "You know what? I didn't apologize to you, but probably owed you an apology." So, I just wanted to say, "Sorry, that was my fault. I don't want to be that person and I have your forgiveness. Or maybe it's a client you're you're on opposite sides with and you just want to get on the right side with them. You're like, "Look, I I had a call with a friend of mine today. I realized that you're not seeing me as your bodyguard and I want you to see me as your bodyguard."
Scott Benson: Meaning, I want you to see me as someone who's on your side and fighting for you. And I want to get on that page with you. And so, if you don't see me that way, I just wanted to say I'm sorry, but let's start let's start this afternoon in that light. Uh that's that's my challenge to all of you. Whether you accept it or not is up to you. Anything else? Anyone else got uh something to add for benefit of all of
Steve Zahnd: big takeaway for me anyways is uh I think it's such a straight line.
Scott Benson: us?
Steve Zahnd: I'm not I fight for you not with you. I mean that's just a I think I'll definitely be using that and even when I'm talking to you know other people that are thinking about joining Rail or joining the team it's kind of the same mentality right we're always looking to protect each other and help each other grow and I think that relationship uh matters with our clients as much as anything else. So I think that was 10 out of 10 feedback.
Scott Benson: Yeah, thanks Steve. And you know what I'll also say we've achieved it on leadership and across our team. So like that's the when I when I actually go through this and I'm like wow this this is how we operate. This is our operation. This is our whole business. We all have this mindset. Are we perfect? No. Can we be offside? Yes. Is there apologies needed here and there? Of course. But like we actually lead this way. We we we do business in this way. And so I I'm so glad that it's a big part of our ethos. Anybody else feedback, questions, comments?
Ryan Campbell: Can you say that script uh one more time? I have to apologize later in the evening and I'm going to need
Steve Zahnd: Oh my
Scott Benson: Yeah. Yeah. So,
Ryan Campbell: it.
Scott Benson: so I just say I just say I'm sorry that was my fault and I don't want to be that guy.
Steve Zahnd: god.
Scott Benson: May I please have your forgiveness? I think the last part is the most important. If all you remember is like, "Sorry, may I have your forgiveness?" Because often times we say sorry, right? Like sorry is not a hard thing to say in this I would say in this world. Like I'm sorry. I'm sorry. My bad. Whatever. But like may I actually have your forgiveness because what you're saying is I want to reconcile with you. I don't want to just clean my side of the street.
Steve Zahnd: Mhm.
Scott Benson: I actually want us to reconcile. And that that is the part where it's like may I have your forgiveness. So I'll say it one last time and we'll we'll peace out on that. Um, I'm I'm sorry. That was my fault. I don't want to be that guy. May I have your forgiveness? There's gold in that. All right. Have a great day, everybody.
